I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
she smelled like a LAN party
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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