I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
He is an equal opportunity slut.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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