This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
