Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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