I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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