dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
