Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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