at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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