Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
