Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
