By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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