So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
that's an acceptable place to lick
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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