Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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