Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
