Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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