mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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