playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
