I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
A+ Viking dick
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize