The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
