I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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