but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
