I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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