Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
birth control should be required to get into college
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
