YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
