You really coming over, don't trick.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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