I wanna bring you to show and tell
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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