I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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