Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
