You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
