Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize