Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Randomize
