I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
