I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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