I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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