my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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