doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
