Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
