I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
