someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
