She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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