I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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