I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
