What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Randomize
