Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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