You made me cry and you don't even care
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i permit you to call me
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
