It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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