I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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