You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
40s are totally the cure
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
