i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize