I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
