He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
